Politics as unintentional comedy. Here are a few of my favorite quotes.
Senator Marco Rubio: “We already have a president now that has no class.” To be fair and put the quote into context, he was criticizing President Obama for using “selfies” and inviting You Tube celebrities to the White House. Hmm…the last I knew (whether you like this president or not), there has been no scandal during nearly seven years of Obama’s presidency, no national embarrassment emanating from the White House. The First Lady and the two Obama daughters have been models of decorum. OK, Senator, what does he have to do to have “class” in your eyes? Make late payments on credit card bills? Default on a mortgage? Get more than a dozen traffic tickets? I guess when YOU are president, things will get classy.
Former Arkansas Governor and current Preacher-in-Chief Mike Huckabee: “We are moving rapidly towards the criminalization of Christianity.” This is the guy who stood and made a speech supporting Kim Davis, the county clerk from Kentucky who refused to perform her secular duty toward any couple that did not merit her approval (faith-based, of course) and still applied for a marriage license. This sort of thing is red meat to Huckabee, but of course, you have to buy his reasoning that law is subservient to religious edicts. While there are countries where that is the case (most prominently, Iran), it is STILL not so here in the United States. I know, I know, that’s different…
“Reality TV” star, real estate multimillionaire, and Presidential candidate Donald Trump: “The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U. S. manufacturing non-competitive.” Well. Glad he was able to clear that up…wait. They must have also falsified all the climate records all over the world and bought off the vast majority of climate scientists, too! Meteorological records indicate a warming trend that several started years ago, and that globally, 2014 was the warmest year since records began to be kept, but will probably be exceeded by 2015. Well, those scientists are not as rich as the Donald, are they? And how many of them own their own casinos or golf courses?
Former First Lady, Former Senator, and Former Secretary of State Hilary Clinton: “I remember landing under sniper fire.” This was purportedly about a visit to Bosnia. It was researched immediately and refuted just as immediately. She is unlikely ever to live this one down.
Jeb Bush, former Florida governor and current Presidential candidate: “As it relates to my brother, there’s one thing I know for sure. He kept us safe.” All except for 9/11, of course, and if that had happened during the Clinton years, you can just imagine the howling Jeb would be doing every day since. At this stage, though, it almost seems like piling on to quote Jeb.
Ted Cruz, U.S. Senator from Texas, Presidential candidate, and by his own admission, “proud wacko bird”: “The last 15 years, there has been no recorded warming. […] It hasn’t happened.” OK, I get it, talking about climate change is not good politics for a guy from Texas. But just ignoring all the data collected the world over to try to make everyone look the other way? That’s a whole other thing.
And last but not least, the Vice President of the United States, Joe Biden: “You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. “ Oh, Joe. We are going to miss you!
My wife made me promise to lay off politics. OK, but NEXT time…